Not too long ago a great new BBQ tool, The BBQ Guru, appeared on the scene that promised to eliminate the worry of the overnight low and slow cook. So many times cooks have got up in the morning only to discover fires gone out or fires gone crazy. Sorry, no pulled pork tonight! However, as promising as this new tool seemed, many cooks found the price to be a major detractor. At over $200, this new tool was a pricey solution for some cooks to swallow.
What to do? Well, here at The Naked Whiz, we had been working on this very same problem and in 1999 we came up with a radical new solution. However, at the time we felt that the marketplace wasn't ready. We put the project on the shelf, biding our time until we felt the marketplace would be more receptive to our innovative work. When all the comments about the price of the aforementioned tool began to surface, we pulled our project off the shelf, set our design team to the task of refining and modernizing the original concept and they responded with the Whizzeroo-Q-Guru®!! So, now here it is, the low cost alternative to charcoal cooking temperature control!! Just follow the links to read all about this exciting new BBQ tool:
UPDATE: With the recent announcement of the new wireless BBQ Guru, many people are wondering if the Whizzeroo-Q-Guru® is going to match the competition and come out with our own wireless model. We would like to point out with great pride that the Whizzeroo-Q-Guru® always has been and always will be totally wireless. Whizzeroo-Q-Guru® produced the original wireless charcoal cooker temperature control device! Rumors also have it that BBQ Guru will soon announce a remote data recording capability, allowing you have your personal computer record data from the BBQ Guru. Well, once again Whizzeroo-Q-Guru® leads the way, as our original model also has remote data recording ability. There are no costly upgrades required!
Disclaimer: Whizzeroo-Q-BBQ is not a registered trademark of nakewhiz.com. There is no such thing as a Process Boundary Analysis technique. There is no such thing as a Borbely Tube Control Grid. We don't even know what a Borbely Tube is. There is no such thing as a multi-dimensional temperature flow analysis and we cut the diagram out of a temperature map of the world, modifying the temperatures to suit our needs. We never trained a 12-month old baby to do anything. That baby may be a different age for all we know. The baby was not harmed in the making of this production. The lady with the horse trailer never received any education either. We have no idea whether or not she is capable of adjusting the temperature on a charcoal cooker. George W. Bush was never given a Whizzeroo-Q-Guru baseball hat. They don't exist. He never attended a product launch as there never was a product launch. Al Gore never made the Whizzerro-Q-Guru a part of his campaign and he never claimed to have invented it. He merely said that he was a big part of it. Mr. Gore also never claimed to be able to control the temperature on 10 charcoal cookers simultaneously. We don't know if Vladimir Putin and George W. Bush are friends, but they damn sure don't talk about charcoal cookers in public. There is no Russian concern interested in marketing a Russian Whizzeroo-Q-Guru, and even if there were, we seriously doubt it would be called a Whizzerooski-Qski-Guruski. We were not serious when we suggested you write your name and address on the back of a hundred dollar bill. We were also not serious when we suggested that you start a chain letter. We have no employees, but even if we did, we doubt we would hire the cousin to the late Laurant Disere Kabila. There is no 10.5 million dollars. There is no trunk. There is no security company in Ghana. Nobody is going to pay you 15% of anything. There are no plans available for the Whizzeroo-Q-Guru. We are not affiliated in any way with any concern that might be marketing a temperature controller with "q" and "guru" in their name. This is a joke. Satire. Humor. Yes, we do think we are the funniest thing since the whoopee cushion.
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