Thursday, December 17, 2009

It's Christmas! Time To Play "The Stupid Ford Remote Start Game"

Yes, folks! It's that time of year again when you can play the hot new sensational game, "The Stupid Ford Remote Start Game"!! It's almost Christmas. The mall parking lots are full and that provides the necessary elements to play the game: Lot's of Fords! Here's how you play:

1) Go to the biggest and busiest mall you can find.
2) Start looking for Ford cars, trucks and SUV's.
3) Locate vehicles that have the number pad on the driver's door.
4) The pad has 5 buttons labeled 1|2 3|4 5|6 7|8 and 9|0
5) Make sure no one is looking and then simultaneously press the 7|8 and 9|0 buttons. You should hear the doors on the vehicle lock.
6) Now, press those two buttons simultaneously again, but this time press them twice in a row in quick succession.
7) IF THE VEHICLE HAS REMOTE START, THE FREAKING ENGINE WILL START!!!!
8) Don't worry, if the owner doesn't come within 10 minutes, the engine will automatically stop.
9) Run away and take up an observational position a safe distance away.
10) If the owner doesn't come before 10 minutes is up and the engine stops itself, YOU WIN 1 POINT!
11) If the owner comes before 10 minutes is up and they stop the engine, YOU WIN 2 POINTS!! (Take a photo of them if you can.)
12) If the owner sees you do it, YOU WIN 5 POINTS!!
13) Go find another vehicle.

(This is true. The engine will start if you lock the doors twice in quick succesion and you have remote start installed. It will also start if you press the lock button on your key fob twice in quick succession. Amazingly, if you are inside the car and press any lock button inside the car twice in quick succession, the engine will start. Wonderful little game for the kiddies to play, eh? What was Ford thinking?? It will even start if you press the fob button followed by the door button. Or the door button followed by the inside lock button. Or any combination.)

Merry Christmas!

- TNW

Disclaimers:
1) There is no such game in reality.
2) We do not condone anyone actually try to play this game which doesn't exist.
3) If you do play the game, which doesn't exist, you do not actually win any points.

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